Massage Tips To Make Him Melt
Set the Tone
Massage is meant to relax and de-stress so, if you are giving someone a massage, you will want to create an ambiance of peace and serenity. Dim the lights, play some soothing music and light scented candles around your massage area. Also, make sure the temperature in the room is slightly warmer than normal, as your partner will be wearing little (if any) clothing.
It is also important to use a suitable massage surface. You will need something that is firm yet comfortable and should be long enough to accommodate the full length of your partner. If you do not have an actual massage table, you can use a floor mat, bed or futon. Keep in mind, however, that it is equally important for you to be able to reach the entire area of your partner’s back without straining. Therefore, using a sofa with a high back may not be appropriate if it will block your access to one side of your partner’s body.
You will also want to use a bit of massage oil, not only for its sensual enjoyment, but more as a necessity. Massage oil reduces the friction between your hands and your partner’s skin, which keeps you from pulling the delicate hairs on his body. You only need a very small amount of massage oil, so don’t get carried away. Dab the massage oil on your hands (not on your partner’s skin), then rub your hands together for a few seconds to warm it up.
All set? Now let’s get into some basic back massage tips.
Start With a Warm Up
A good massage is like a piece of classical music – it starts slowly, crescendos to a climax and then descends to a delicate end. As you begin your massage, keep these basic tips in mind.
The warm up is meant to ease your partner into a state of relaxation so that he can enjoy the full benefit of his massage. Your massage warm up should begin with a series of smooth, rhythmic strokes known as effleurage, a French term meaning “to lightly touch.” This technique is used extensively during a Swedish massage. There are several types of effleurage strokes used at certain intervals throughout the massage session. The various strokes require different amounts of pressure from different parts of the hand (for example, the fingertips or the entire palm).
Step 1: Start by applying gentle pressure with your fingertips. Trace slow, circular patterns up and down the sides of his spine. This is where the largest group of muscles in the back is located and it is also where you will notice the most muscle knots. If you feel a knot in your partner’s back, make a mental note of its location so you can return to it later. Move from the muscles around the spine to the shoulders, in between the shoulder blades and up to the back of the neck.
Step 3: Now take the massage deeper by using only the heel of your hand. Because you are massaging with a smaller surface area, the pressure naturally increases. Apply slow, circular strokes with both hands moving outward from the upper back, then move up and back toward the center. Work your way all the way up to your partner’s upper back. This entire step should take about 5 minutes.
Step 4: After massaging with the heels of your hands, move on to this next massage tip. Move to one side of your partner and begin a deeper massage with your fingertips. Splay out your fingertips and lay one hand directly on top of the other so you can apply twice as much pressure. Starting at the lower back, push down firmly, moving away from your partner’s spine out toward his side. Lightly glide your fingers back inward and do the same thing again a bit higher up. Work your way up your partner’s upper back like this for several minutes, then switch to the other side of his body.
Now your partner should be fully relaxed and ready for the most intensive portion of the massage.
Of course, because you are not a licensed professional, you will not be giving an actual deep tissue massage. But this is the point in your massage session in which you use the firmest amount of pressure and do the most healing.
Put your hands on either side of his spine and splay out your fingers. Now apply deep pressure with your thumbs only, moving in concentric circles up and down his back. Your thumbs use the strongest muscles in your hands, and they are perfect for applying deep, intense pressure.
Now is the time to tackle any knots you noticed earlier. Approach these areas with more gentle pressure, rubbing around and on top of the tense tissue, then work up to deeper pressure. Check in with your partner at regular intervals to make sure that he is in no pain or discomfort. Remember, this is for his benefit.
Offer Him a Cool Down
Finish with these massage tips for a relaxing a cool down: Taper the firm pressure of your thumbs into a gentler kneading by all of your fingers. Knead the muscles up and down your partner’s back by mimicking the pattern a wave lapping against the shore and then pulling back out to sea. After a few minutes, move on to the techniques you used during the warm up, but in reverse. Start with Step 4 and work your way backward to Step 1, ending with a feather-light fingertip rub.
How Bad is Your Back Pain?
So your back hurts? Take our back pain quiz to see how severe it really is. You may need to see a doctor but have just been avoiding it thinking it will get better. On the other hand, your back pain may be more normal than you suspect. Find out where your back pain ranks in this ergonomics quiz.